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The Limerick Writer's avatar

LOL! I also heard that the players were only going to be allowed to run at 3mph to reduce the cost of feeding them at lunchtime training sessions.

WombleWorld's avatar

This is very likely. We also hear the recent poor form is to save money on win bonuses

Neural Foundry's avatar

Love the "scarfflation" bit. The way you thread financial anxiety through absurdist humor really captures how club finances feel incomprehensible untill someone explains it through beer quality. Used to follow my local club's financial reports and found the same thing, numbers mean nothing but watered-down pints tell the real story. Solid satire that actually lands becuase it's rooted in something real.

WombleWorld's avatar

Appreciate that. Glad you enjoyed it. Beer quality is an alarmingly effective way of articulating complex subject matters.